Serving in Prison Chaplaincy

The Revd Sheila Nall

When I began the business of discerning what I felt was a call to Priesthood, I had absolutely no idea where it might take me. During the three years at Theological College I still hadn't a clue where I'd end up. Through the first year of curacy: not a whit clearer. Occasionally, when I heard others describe their burning desire to be a This or a That, I'd feel flutterings of panic: maybe I ought to be clearer where God was leading me; maybe God was waiting for me to do some serious thinking about this - or that. Maybe I was missing the message God was giving me. But then I'd settle back into my certainty that I'd no more idea than when I'd first begun. That seemed right somehow and I was quite comfortable bobbing about in an open sea of not knowing but trusting.

While all that is a pretty accurate picture of the spiritual side of things, practicalities were exerting an uncomfortable pressure. I'd opted for NSM status because I wanted to stay ‘in the world' in a hazy sort of a way and because I couldn't imagine my atheist husband living in a vicarage. In my case, this meant part-time paid work and, to cut a complicated story short, money (or lack of it) became a real issue.

Then Bishop Peter suggested I look at Prison Chaplaincy. I visited Long Lartin, the high security prison near Evesham and within minutes felt a strong sense that I wanted, needed to be with prisoners. A visit to HMP Blakenhurst set the seal on this feeling and I simply stuck. I am now the Anglican Chaplain there and it feels like something for which my whole life has been a preparation. And the money's not bad.
There are challenges, of course, but the rewards are high. There is the young man who was in a deep depression and gradually regained his health, strength and faith in a God of love very different from the God of fear he'd grown up with. There is the man who had made an impressive if messy attempt to kill himself and asked me to pray with him. There's the abused lad who found stability in Islam - and shyly asked me if I minded. (I didn't.) There are so many I have been privileged to be with at defining moments in what have often been damaged lives devoid of love. I guess that's what we Chaplains do: we show love to the loveless. For me, there could be no better way to be Christ's disciple and I thank God for it.